


The College Diary Of Patrick Stump

by llamasonasurfboard



Category: Bandom, Cobra Starship, Fall Out Boy, My Chemical Romance, Panic! at the Disco, Twenty One Pilots
Genre: Because frank duh, College, Diary/Journal, For every semester he finishes, Frank is an angry gnome, Gabe saporta is alwyas a vital piece, He'll recap what happens, I will try to piece it together, Love Triangles, M/M, My friend thought it was funny though, Patrick writes in a diary sort of, Rolling with the punches, So mission accomplished, This is so messy i'm sorry, Why is frank always my favorite character to write, also i have no idea what i'm doing
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-06-18
Updated: 2017-06-30
Packaged: 2018-11-15 20:00:58
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 11,459
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11238144
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/llamasonasurfboard/pseuds/llamasonasurfboard
Summary: Patrick has a lot of thoughts, and he channels them into his diary he writes in every end of each semester of college. Sometimes they make sense, but most of the time they really don't. And most of the times it's just a retelling of the weird things that happen to him and his friends. With weird reflections.But I mean who can blame him, with those kind of friends it's probably even hard to think. Which is proven by their homework.(Hint! They're too loud for their own good)





	1. Freshman Year, First Semester

**Author's Note:**

> Heyya
> 
> So well this is what I will write on when I have no idea what to write on my chat fic and this will only be either 8 or 9 chapters long (a chapter for each semester), so it's not gonna be that long. It's more of a fun thing to write on when I have no idea what to write :))))))

College is supposed to be fun. That is what everyone tells me all the time. But as I walked into the doors of my first college class I realized everyone had been lying to me. College was not fun at all, and especially not when you had your best friend Pete Wentz with you.

Pete Wentz was a special guy. He claimed to be “gay above the waist” which obviously was a lie. He was gay all over. But despite his rejection towards his gayness he’s an all around cool guy. A list of five things that Pete Wentz is;

• Gay, despite the rejection  
• A party animal  
• Not heterosexual  
• A killer at bass  
• Attracted to guys

I met him during my high school years aka my worst years. I used to be a “chubby grape”, as Pete likes to call me. I can do no other than agree to his statement. He was however no more better than me. With his emo fringe and eyeliner which made him look like a raccoon it is nothing but embarrassing to look back at it. But then during the summer between senior year of high school and the first year of college he went away for more than a whole month without ever saying anything to me. I even thought he had committed suicide, but his parents assured me that he was just out on a life journey. It didn’t help my case at all.

But then he turned up at my door the 29th of July and said he’s found his true spirit. He now had cut his hair short, gotten a few more tattoos and seemingly gotten more ripped as well. I decided to punch him in the face and then hug him, which in turn may not have been the best decision because he bled onto my favorite shirt and so I had to trash that.

The conclusion? Pete Wentz was a special guy, but he wasn’t my only friend (but my best friend).

There was also Joe Trohman and Andy Hurley. I met them when I started high school, in music class. Joe was sitting in the corner of the classroom, looking angry at nothing in particular. Andy was doing jumping jacks on the other side of the room, while every other student were seated in the middle and playing on some instrument. They looked like a group of hippies if I’m being honest and that’s saying something when it comes from me.

Me, the unsocial being I was back then, went over to sit in my own corner. There I played some guitar and sang a little, and before I knew it Joe was sitting in front of me. He was a special guy back then, and he’s a special guy now as well - if not even more. A list of five things Joe Trohman is;

• A killer on guitar  
• High, most of the time  
• A funny guy  
• Moose(y)  
• Taller than me, like most people

Joe complimented my singing skills and said that I was a true soul punk. I didn’t understand what he meant back then, and I still don’t. Joe then decided to show off his own amazing guitar skills (which were much better than mine, I even thought I’d never play again because I was that much worse) and play some random riffs from random songs. Some I recognized, some I didn’t recognize at all.

Then Andy walked over to us with a whole drum set that he was pushing on a mat. He said we looked much cooler than the kids sitting in the middle, which got someone to throw a drumstick in his head. Andy still owns that drumstick and even has it put in a glass dome on a pedestal at home.

Andy is quite different from Joe and Pete, a nice change. He’s not as energetic as Pete is nor is he as gone as Joe is. A list of five things Andy Hurley is; (this will be a recurring theme yes)

• A killer at drums  
• Scary looking  
• Albeit nice  
• Terrifying when angry  
• Pete’s personal “that is bullshit Pete" speaker

So, with these guys I barely made it through high school. Pete once managed to set a chair on fire after pretending to be Pyro from X-Men. Another time he went to one of Gabe Saporta’s parties (he’ll be more important later), got so wasted that he made out with a plant and then proceeded to throw things out of Gabe’s house. I don’t think Gabe ever got to know who threw out his Xbox 360. Joe once took a live action real ~~damn~~ cat with him to school and got multiple students to have an allergic reaction. People never got to know it was his cat as he blamed it on a guy called Kellin Quinn who later was banned from the school grounds. That incident resulted in some rivals and the loss in someone’s finger (Andy accidentally broke one of the guys’ fingers and the guy later had to amputate it for some reason). I once made the boys’ locker room smell of rotten fish, which admittedly wasn’t much worse than what it smelled like from the beginning. Then all four of us managed to blow up not one, not two, but three amplifiers at one session. Pete thought he was playing a simple prank on us, which resulted in us playing the school five hundred dollars. Thanks Pete.

So as we have been through even more stuff than what I currently can come up with, naturally we decided to go to the same college. We all got in luckily and decided to get ourselves a shared apartment close by (no one wants to live in a dorm), making it cheaper for all of us (even if I pay 33% of the rent, Pete 25% and Andy and Joe 21% each, and we still do to this day).

So on my first day of college I met a guy by the name of William Beckett in my third class. He said he recognized me from photos that Gabe had sent to him that Pete in turn had sent to Gabe. Photos I had no idea that Pete had sent to anyone. I hoped to god that it wasn’t anything strange that he had sent, and I even tried to take William’s phone from him. And as I’m writing this I wonder why William decided to befriend me in the first place as I managed to break his phone’s screen which in turn made him cry.

I was later on so ashamed by my horrible first impression that I didn’t speak to William for the next six lessons despite the fact that we sat next to each other. It wasn’t until he forcefully took my homework and sprinted away with it (a crime dear I tell you) that I had to speak to him. Apparently he was totally over the fact that I broke his phone as it wasn’t his. How that was any better still confuses me.

In music class I met a guy called Frank. He honestly scared me (and still kinda do). Especially when he smashed his guitar right next to me because he became so enraged over the fact that he couldn’t sing some Misfits lyrics as it was apparently too inappropriate. A part of the guitar hit me in the face, knocking my glasses off my face and placing a perfect purple bruise under my eye. And Frank wasn’t at all as hardcore as I imagined him to be as he quickly apologized to me and started to panic as he accidentally stepped on my glasses and broke them.

Thankfully, I got him to call Pete for me (I’m about as blind as a bat without my glasses) who immediately started to panic. I also managed to get Pete a scolding because he left in the middle of one of his classes, but at least I got my glasses back (I had a pair of spare glasses incase something like that would happen, I was prepared for everything. Almost. ) Frank also wouldn’t stop apologizing to me and said he’d make it up for me the next music lesson. Which he did. He brought me a guitar despite him not knowing that I could play guitar. I still own that guitar and every time he sees it I see the regret on his face.

So, Frank was one of my new friends. Back then he used to smoke a lot, but he has toned it down a bit by now (keyword: a bit). He’s still that angry and hates when people criticize him or his work, and he’s still in the slightest taller than me. It still amazes me how he can go and complain about being short when I’m clearly shorter than him. But alas, a list of five things Frank is;

• Angry  
• Short, but taller than me  
• Very gay, he has made this clear many times  
• The definition of an angry gnome  
• Actually a very caring guy, despite all the anger

He is still trying to get used to the fact that I wear fedoras as a normal day accessory.

After a week or two, Frank introduces me to two of the most exotic people you’ll ever meet, the Way brothers Gerard and Mikey. Gerard was Frank’s boyfriend (and still is during the meantime as I’m writing this) and back then he used to have really greasy black hair to which he has nowadays colored red. Frank will never stop calling him a lesbian because of it. His lesbian.

Gerard however sang like a god (still does) even if he told me that I sang like a god I thought he sang like a god. But he was also very good at art, which he said he was a god in. I could not oppose that. But in general he was a nice guy, a little creepy with his obsession with death but a funny guy (minus the depressing jokes). Anyways onto a list of five things Gerard is;

• Artsy  
• High but actually not high  
• Coffee addict  
• Awkward  
• Creepy

If Gerard is all of these things then his brother is the opposite of it. Okay well they were both awkward and still are but they are notorious for their awkwardness until they finally get some alcohol in their system. They are then the most carefree people I know and are very fun to be with because you never know what they’re gonna do. Although they keep on saying that they will never drink. But then drink. I never stated they were normal.

But anyways, Mikey is probably one of the people that now are closest to me that I’ve met during college. It could be because Pete has an not so obvious hard on for him, but I like to believe that it’s because I am great at making friends that I get to hang so much with him. I know I’m lying to myself.

Despite Mikey looking nothing like his older brother he is… he’s not that much like him either. A list of five things Mikey is;

• Awkward, prio one  
• Never able to laugh or smile (it’s an achievement once you succeed)  
• Also a coffee addict  
• Very lame  
• The coolest dude I know (even if he is very lame and awkward. It fits my aesthetic)

Just like his brother Mikey looked different back then. Nowadays he has blonde hair but back then it was brown (man how the time changes over a few months) ~~I mean it is still brown on the sides~~ He also used to have glasses but then he got some eye surgery (rip). Admittedly he looks hotter now than back then. He also is incredibly skinny (even more rip). I’m gonna have to ask him how he manages to stay skinny. What are his secrets. I wonder if those fake ads you see actually are true.

Whatever. My first meeting with these two was to say the least exciting. I met them in music class (our teacher is barely awake on the lessons, he’s very weird) and Frank didn’t get a single thing done as he and Gerard kept on making out with each other. I felt sorry for Mikey (who in all honesty looked disgusted) and decided to talk to him, which may have been the most awkward encounter I’ve ever had with anyone.

It started off with me yelling a hello at him which in turn scared him. Then when I was supposed to say my name I spat on him which made him visibly flinch and at the same time kill a part of me. We then spoke about everything and nothing because I really needed to have a conversation going and so I said something along the lines of “hey you like smashing pumpkins too? (I pointed at his shirt then) I think axl rose has a really nice voice.” and it wasn’t until a few seconds later that I realized that I said the wrong singer and he looked so deeply offended I wondered if it would have hurt less if i just had told him he could go and die. I thankfully recovered from that but made one small mistake which led to him not daring to speak to me for weeks - I asked him if he was single. Right after those words left my mouth I ran out of the classroom and didn’t come out of our dorm until the next day.

That was possibly the most awkward encounter I’ve ever had with someone. But at least I got ice-cream out of it (for free, which later didn’t turn out to be free because Pete bought it with my money).

A few weeks after that Pete took home three new friends to our apartment - Brendon, Ryan and Dallon. The three are really close friends, and have apparently been ever since they were kiddos. Who even says kiddos any longer Patrick stop yourself.

Brendon (who Pete is the closest to, I’ll start with him) has a big forehead. And just as big vocal range as that. He’s also very loud, partly because of his ADHD and partly because well he is Brendon. He’s a social and loud person but he has a good heart, despite the fact that he flipped me off the first time I met him.

Forehead or not, a list of five things Brendon is;

• Loud  
• Extra  
• 78% forehead  
• Gayer than the gayest gay  
• A bully (But not really)

I am still recovering after the fact he flipped me off.

Ryan Ross is a gay extravaganza dude, and he was even gayer and more extravaganza back then. Nowadays he’s just extravaganza with a dash of gay (the way I write it makes it seem like it has gone years. It has only gone a few months) He also used to have the ugliest haircut in the history of haircuts, right after Brendon and Mikey. The two of them were and still are unbeatable. Even Pete’s emo hair during high school was better, and that’s talking about something terrible.

I still have mixed feelings about Ryan however. Once he told me he really liked my fedora (the first time anyone has ever said that) but just a few hours after that he told me it was ugly. Hopefully he wasn’t sober. Ryan likes to get high just like Joe and Frank do. They think they’re cool. ~~Hint! (they’re not)~~

Then once he threatened me and Pete because we were laughing too loudly and he was sleeping in our apartment for some reason (I was sleep deprived which makes me giggly and Pete was having a bad case of homework (and really not feeling like doing them)). At other times he joins in on our sleep deprivation/homework procrastination. He’s a weird guy. But Pete likes him. And he writes good lyrics (I’ve heard).

A list of five things Ryan the extravaganza Ross is;

• Extravaganza (with a dash of gay)  
• Depressing (with a dash of fun)  
• Rude (with a dash of nice)  
• Snobby (with a dash of no money)  
• Most likely always high (with a dash of… uh something)

Then we have the last member of the group of boys that are stuck in a love triangle (seriously they probably are), Dallon. He is really tall. Like really fuckin tall. When I first met Mikey I was like; “shit this guy is tall” but then I met Dallon and I thought I was looking up the empire state building. Sure that Gabe is tall (I believe he is in the slightest taller than Dallon) but I’m used to him teasing me, Pete and recently Frank for being short (honorable mention he says Brendon is short as well and has recently gone over to teasing the Way brothers for being short despite them being average and slightly above average (i ~~n height okay~~ ))

Dallon is a good guy though. Brendon is the annoying one, Ryan is the rude but not actually rude one so Dallon is a nice change from the others. He’s a tad bit awkward, but judging from all the awkward meetings I’ve had with people he is nothing I can’t handle. I’m hella sure he has a thing for Brendon though. That hella made me sound like Pete. I am being infected.

Okay okay onto the right track again ( ~~Patrick you are writing to yourself stop pretending that others are reading this okay (sorry~~ )). A list of five things Dallon is;

• Tree  
• Awesome  
• Laidback  
• Luscious

• Did I say tall?

Anyways. The three of them are cool when they are together (even if the tension is clear) and they are childhood friends as well. Pete says he likes to tease them about it, and he did it the first time he met them (for some reason, Pete never really has a motivation for doing things). Apparently he also said their height differences made them look funny when they walked next to each other. He got hit in the head with a lady purse by Ryan.

It’s fantastic to me how I’ve managed to gain literally six friends in the spawn of a few months (well three, the other three were thanks to Pete (actually one the other two were thanks to frank)). I like to look back at those memories, but then realize that I am very cringe so I gladly stop. I used to have a real bad case of FAKE sideburns. Thinking I was cool. Oh how wrong I was.

But alas, it’s the end of my first semester as a freshman at this hell forbidden college. Currently as I am writing this I am laying in a bed (presumably Gabe Saporta, oh also forgot to introduce him… I will do that later on if anything weird happens with him oh wait it always does). The bed is also very comfy as a side note. But like I wrote ( ~~stop it Patrick seriously~~ ) I am in bed on my back (making it very uncomfortable to write this) with Mikey sleeping next to me (he’s breathing on me and I am not sure if I am sexually aroused or grossed out) and Pete is on the floor. Frank was here for a few minutes ago and I am pretty sure Gerard is still in that damn closet.

My first college party was supposed to be exciting, and for some reason I took this book with me (to reflect on things like these). It was quite the wild party really. Gabe came up to me, leaned in sexually and whispered; “you’re short”. I don’t think I have ever thrown my drink in someone’s face but I won’t do it again. Or maybe. Probably.

I lost Pete the second we arrived at the place, and Joe and Andy disappeared after I had tried to look for Pete for about five seconds. Later on I found out Andy was in an arm wrestling competition (and he was winning, don’t know the end results though) and that Joe had joined some dance dance revolution on the apartment's roof (glad that Pete never can have a party because we have democracy in our damn apartment and we have already gotten complains about how we have too many friends over) He seemed to be losing against some guy named Spencer that Brendon was cheering on. Maybe a potential future friend.

Later on I found Frank and Gerard making out in front of a chocolate fountain. Frank then succeeded in pushing Gerard into it and it all turned into some weird porno random people were both cheering on and filming. I was even tempted to do something as well but decided against it. I am a responsible adult. I try to tell myself everyday as I want to push Pete off a cliff.

Speaking of Pete, apparently he had joined a game of strip poker and had only ended up in his underwear. I can make a statement that he was hotter than what I originally had thought he was. ( ~~Patrick that’s a weird thought about your best friend (but he is (I know I can’t deny it~~ ))) then he started to make out with Ryan for some reason. It was weird to watch but hot nonetheless. I even think Dallon filmed it. Dallon also had a tree competition with Gabe. What the meant I have no idea.

Then the party got boring (because I wasn’t doing any sort of social interaction ~~whatever that now is~~ ) so I retreated to a bedroom. Not the best idea as two people later on walked in there but slowly backed out as they saw me. Then I started writing in you, my book. About Pete, Joe, Andy, high school, college and everyone I met. Mikey came in after my first three sentences and laid down next to me (“pattycakes will you treat me like a princess and tell me that i’m not an asshole"). I was to question him but he looked too cuddly to say against, and then he fell asleep as I was running my hands through his hair and writing with my left hand (which makes the text looks shitty (as if it already could look shittier (Patrick you sound like Ryan now)))

Pete stumbled in a few minutes after that and laid down on the floor (now in clothes) and Gerard walked in just a few seconds later and told me to be quiet as he closed the closet door behind him door. Some guy with a big fro I have yet to be greeted to asked as to why Mikey (whom he apparently knew) was cuddled up against me and where Gerard Way was. I answered I have no idea on both questions. Gerard has yet to emerge from the closet.

But other than that, first semester has been totally okay ( ~~who are you lying to Patrick it was horrible~~ ). Hopefully my next encounters with others’ friends won’t be as awkward.

‘til end of next semester

(PS Pete just woke up and asked as to why Mikey was next to me. I believe he may think we slept together even if we are fully clothed and on the covers of a clean bed)

Freshman;  
CHECK

Sophomore;

 

Junior;

 

Senior;

 

Graduation;


	2. Freshman year, second semester

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Idk why but this chapter is fuckin with me on my phone but I really wanted to post so I have no idea how it really turned out but whatever

Well well I guess I should start this with saying that I have now gained three new set of friends (all whom originally were friends of my friends. I am the friend stealer) I gained one of them through Gerard (who is a year older than all of us, and so we met him through Gerard because he too is a year older than all of us. Rip us when the two graduate) and the two other through Brendon and Ryan. All of them are generally nice guys.

But starting off with my favorite, Ray. He’s friends with the Way brothers and Frank but mostly Gerard I guess. He and Joe are also pretty great friends (fro squad). Seriously though Ray has an amazing fro, I wish I could get one to be honest ( ~~no you don’t Patrick~~ )

A list of five things Ray is;

• A cuddly bear

• The fro god

• The cupcake smasher (I’ll get to that another time)

• The odd one of his friends (Gerard, Frank and Mikey)

• Done with everyone’s ~~shit~~ 200% of the time

Then I met Spencer and Jon, two relatively cool guys. They were originally friends with Ryan and Brendon, but have now taken a liking to Pete (like everyone does) and are now following him around. Hopefully they will stop when we start our sophomore year. I am not jealous no.

They have too apparently seen the obvious love triangle as well (and according to their studies Dallon likes Brendon and Brendon likes Ryan who is a little too full of himself and there’s a 50/50 odd on who he will start liking. His current stance is either being gay (and in denial) or loving himself too much). They are still studying Ryan’s next move.

But despite their creepy antics on trying to figure out their friends’ love triangle they are generally kinda cool (cooler than my own friends ( ~~Patrick they are your friends~~ )). I haven’t gotten to know them too well over this semester but I spent one afternoon trying to piece together some evidence they found for Ryan having a girlfriend. It ended with Ryan trashing every evidence they had.

However. A list of five things Spencer is;

• An awful detective

• Really cute 

• And cuddly

• Andy’s drumming rival

• The kindest in his group of friends

And then we have a list of five things Jon is;

• The chillest of the chill

• Probably high as I’m writing this

• Also an awful detective

• Brendon’s personal “that’s bullshit Brendon” speaker (apparently everyone needs one)

• Least cuddly person alive (hates cuddles a lot)

I met Ray at the start of this year and Spencer and Jon a couple of weeks after. Now that Brendon and Ryan officially were friends with us (mainly Pete because Pete is still friends with ~~fucking~~ everyone) they decided it could be fun to add their other friends. I don’t get how Dallon fits into the picture because he doesn’t seem to be friends with Spencer nor Jon. They actually seem to have a sort of feud with each other. But since I am no detective I am not sure.

My meeting with Ray was pleasant. Like every other weekend did Frank and the Way brothers show up at our apartment but this time there was a Ray with them. He immediately clicked with Joe and just half an hour into our gathering (aka drinks and games you played when you were twelve) the two of them were gone. To this day I have no idea where they went and I didn’t see either for three days.

But speaking of that little gathering, we were playing a game of never have I ever. Here’s a list of things I got to know and was genuinely surprised over; (I like making lists)

• Pete has never blacked out drunk (although I am pretty sure he was lying)

• Gerard has dressed in drag. Numerous of times.

• Frank once peed his pants because a big hairy spider was crawling on him (Mikey then said it was just a small normal house spider which got Frank to throw a bottle of vodka at him. Which missed and has now stained our carpet)

• Pete and Brendon have exchanged handjobs numerous of times

• Ryan is a virgin (actually not too surprising)

• Brendon has wished to make out with someone in this room that isn’t Ryan

• Gerard once tried to sell drugs but ended up at a strip club (no one questioned him)

• Both Gerard and Brendon have apparently “worked the stage” at a strip club

• Pete has not slept with Gabe Saporta

• Mikey has slept with Gabe Saporta

• Mikey has slept with 76 people already (Frank amazingly remembered all of them)

• Dallon was bullied when he was younger because he was too tall (and apparently that was a bad thing)

• Frank and Gerard have yet to had sex

And a lot of more things that I currently don’t remember. I was the most sober one at the end of the game and I felt very dumb. Brendon and Pete were the least sober ones, not too surprising. Brendon also danced to Le Freak for half an hour (the song was on repeat) and Gerard said it was his go to song (despite it being an awful song) and then the two had a dance off. During that time Pete went and got a bucket of water and then poured it over Gerard. He was not pleased. Neither was I as we still have an ugly patch of water on the carpet, much like with the vodka. At least that spot doesn’t smell funny.

Frank smoked 37 cigarettes that night and then came back to us and told us he was never to smoke again. He smelled so much smoke I even thought he’d walked inside a burning house. He held his word though, no one has seen him smoke again. He may smoke in secret however. I’ll leave that up to Spencer and Jon.

From reports by Mikey and Andy, Ryan apparently left the second that Brendon started to dance. Speaking of Mikey and Andy, Andy was trying to get Mikey to exercise the rest of the night but it ended up with Andy falling down a set of stairs and Mikey leaving for a party Gabe Saporta apparently had somewhere. It was probably a so called 'booty call’ that I’ve heard Pete mention before.

I spend most of the night in a bathtub with Dallon (we were arguably the most sober ones) discussing Hitchcock movies.

So that was the first of many gatherings us friends would have. By the time that I’m writing this we have had three more, one of which I tell about later. By the time that I’m writing this we have yet to be given a complaint by the neighbors. I am sure we will be given one soon enough. (I’m not even sure if they live here any longer. Or if anyone did in the beginning for the matter)

I also think Pete may have fucked our landlady to lower our rent. She’s a 62 year old woman. Pete is desperate for money but she has yet to claim him as his sugar baby. Maybe I should get a sugar daddy ( ~~Patrick you’re not Mikey (that was very rude of me he’s not even the most sexual of my friends~~ ))

Yet another list but this time of the most sexual ones of my friends;

• Brendon

• Pete

• Frank

• Mikey

• Gerard

• Joe

• Jon

• Andy

• Spencer

• Dallon

• Ryan

I am sure that Brendon would go around and ~~fuck~~ everyone (or be ~~fucked~~ ) if it wasn’t for the fact that he is totally whipped for Ryan who in turn isn’t interested in sex at all. Same with Frank, he would have sex here and there if it wasn’t for the fact that he’s together with Gerard who in turn is scared of having sex with Frank (because he thinks Frank won’t like him for some reason) but makes millions of sex jokes.

On another note, Joe brought his cat with him this semester. It triggered an allergic reaction in Gerard and so Joe had to take it home to his parents. I believe it may live on the street (although Joe swears it’s living with one of his friends. What he keeps on forgetting is the fact that he has no friends other than us).

I was also at one of Gabe Saporta’s infamous parties. Frank said it was his birthday party. So naturally I congratulated him on his birthday. Then it turns out his birthday is in October (Pete told me) and I didn’t speak to Gabe for the next few weeks of meeting him, much like I did to William. I seem to have a pattern when it comes to awkward situations.

I later on confronted Frank about it, and he hastily said that maybe he confused Gabe and William’s birthdays as the two are close friends. The only thing is that William has no idea who Frank is, meaning that Frank either stalked him or lied right in my face. My bet is for the latter.

Speaking of William, he and I have become closer. He once even brought me a pack of doughnuts. The next time we met I brought him a pack of cupcakes. We now have a sort of ceremony to bring each other treats at the end of every month. I think my diabetes is getting worse. Thanks William.

Back to Gabe’s party however. Apparently Pete finally got to have sex with him. Gabe denies it. I believe Pete may be lying because he seemed to be triggered when Mikey confessed to have slept with him. Either Pete is jealous and in love with Gabe or he wants to impress Mikey in some sort if way. Still not sure if Pete is attracted to Mikey or our landlady. I will have to ask Spencer and Jon if they want to work with it.

Frank also proposed to Gerard. Gerard said no. He proposed in a gallery with lots of people looking at them. Thankfully, he remembered that it was April the first and he said it was a big prank. Gerard started to cry and ran away with his eyeliner running down his cheeks (like the true emo he still is). Mikey chased after him while Ray start to yell at Frank. For some reason Brendon and Andy started to throw fries at Frank. Everyone were booing at him which in turn got him to cry as well. Ryan then started to read up sad poems he’d written to distract the crowd. It seemed to work as Joe and Ray walked away with Frank (and Brendon and Andy continuously throwing fries until they didn’t reach any longer). Pete then joined in on the sad poems. It turned out into a rap battle between sad poems. I was left confused with Dallon sipping some tea next to me as he watched the drama. I think he may secretly enjoy drama. Gonna leave that to Spencer and Jon as well.

Frank later on apologized with a big serenade outside of Gerard’s classroom window where he sat. The professor was not pleased as he told Frank to go to hell and let the poor boy be. Gerard then got angry (a retelling by Ray, by the way (by the ray)) and told the professor that his boyfriend was only showing his love for him. Gerard ran out of the classroom and the two was not seen for two days after that. They have yet to confess to what they were doing and the only thing they achieved was to send Mikey into an anxiety attack.

This semester I also got to smoke weed for the first time. Both Joe and Jon persisted that I should try. I finally understood why Ryan always seemed to be so unavailable every time you spoke to him (seriously, it’s like he was on another planet. He didn’t even look at me when he spoke - slurred - to me). Maybe I’m too short. No he was just being an ~~ass~~.

Ryan had also gotten angrier and ruder/cruder by each day that had gone. In the middle of May (I believe) something in him switched and he sat crouched up in the corner of his dorm room for 15 hours (according to Brendon and Dallon). Brendon documented that he didn’t go to the toilet for the entire time. Apparently that was important facts for all of us.

After his mental breakdown (the Way brothers were convinced it was as they too have been through multiple mental breakdowns. Going to ask them about their mental health later today) he was totally lost for five days and didn’t speak to anyone. He showed up at our apartment at 4am with a coffee labeled ‘Peter'. Then he proceeded to cry against Pete’s shoulder until 7 am (according to Pete) when he fell asleep at the couch. Apparently Ryan had gotten a bad comment on his work by his philosophy teacher and was total wreck because of it.

(Nowadays Ryan is a-okay, just not to worry future Patrick. I am also going to cringe horribly by this segment when I’m older)

We then had another gathering (in our apartment) to celebrate “The Rebirth of Ryan” (as Brendon called it). I don’t remember anything from it other than I grabbed Brendon by the ~~ass~~ butt and the two of us fooled around a little. I also woke up in a cupboard (Mikey was slamming his feet against it as he sat on the counter, and I effectively scared the living shit out of him as I opened the door). I have no idea how I ended up there however and neither do the others as they too were drunk. Gerard woke up with lipstick by his mouth and a dress on. Frank was the one who had worn the lipstick, apparently.

We also went to a zoo about three weeks ago. Pete dropped his phone into the monkey’s habitat. The people who worked there said it was his fault and shamed him for being so careless. Joe then thought it was super funny to piss the workers off by climbing into the habitat to get the phone. He ended up with a broken ankle instead.

Mikey and I went to look at the aquarium. Apparently Mikey forgot he was deadly afraid of sharks and started to panic as one of them swam very close to the glass and seemed to stop in front of him. Frank made the same mistake by following Gerard to the room where they have spiders, snakes and scorpions (or the SSS, as Gerard likes to call it). Both Frank and Mikey got an ice-cream by Andy and then acted like small kids at a zoo seeing the animals for their first time.

According to Brendon, Ryan had some beef with a gorilla who kept grunting at him. Ryan opposed this however and said that gorillas grunt normally. Dallon said that it was just protecting its kids. I still have no idea who is telling the truth as I do not know anything about gorillas and was too lazy to Google it.

When we ate a bird shat on Jon and he angrily left to never be seen again. Okay we saw him an hour later, drenched in water however. A peacock also came up to us as we sat and ate and flashed it's fancy feathers to Pete who said that she was trying to impress him. Spencer told him it was a guy. Pete said that the peacock was gay and continued to eat in silence.

We also held a birthday party for me, Gerard and Brendon. It was wild. Gabe was the one who hosted it (because he’s the fuckin party planner and if he doesn’t become a party planner or whatever when he’s older I don’t know what). I know I performed Love Will Tear Us Apart and then immediately jumped into All-Star with Brendon. Gerard then came in (dressed in drag because why the heck not) and began singing on I’m Coming Out. We ended it with Dancing Queen and then Gabe put on some random shitty music. I know I danced with Pete, and Andy. He was a killer a breakdance, apparently.

I also know I walked into the bathroom to see Gerard blowing Frank (still dressed in drag), no one of them noticed, thankfully. I never mentioned it to them. I also walked in on William fucking some girl (I thought he was gay what a shame), but they noticed me. The next day in class William had an apology speech ready for me.

Pete downed an entire bottle of whiskey in one go, and I joined Joe and Ray on the roof and watched their floofs flow in the wind. Then Andy came up and told us to come down to the others. I did not see Joe and Ray for the rest of the night, but they probably sat and were philosophical while their floofs flowed in the wind dramatically and delicately.

I managed to see Gabe demonstrating on how to pleasure your partner the best on Mikey, but was then pulled away by Brendon whom I made out with until I was pulled away by Dallon who started to make out with Brendon. I think the two had sex that night.

When I went out to take some fresh air in the complex I saw Ryan sitting on the stairs. He was writing something on his arm and looked like a crazed maniac (but was probably only high) so I decided to walk back inside.

I joined my first game of truth or dare, and finally got to kiss Gabe Saporta (who tasted awfully a lot of alcohol, unsurprisingly). Gabe was not impressed with me however and then proceeded to rub his hand on Mikey’s thigh for the rest of the game. It was highly distracting. Pete also confessed that he once thought I was attractive but that I had gotten too boyish with my looks. I have yet to confront him about it.

All in all, the night ended with Gerard and Frank in the bathroom (apparently they passed out there), Dallon and Brendon under the coffee table in the living-room (clad in only underwear) and Andy passed out by our open fridge (with a snickers in his hand, for some reason). Pete didn’t sleep the whole night, managing to keep Spencer awake for the majority of it. Jon had disappeared as fast as the guests had arrived and we greeted him the next morning as he came back with a superman cape on. Ryan spent the night on the stairs (and someone was nice enough to lay a blanket on him, presumably our landlady who has yet to tell us to be quiet). Mikey came back when all of us had gotten some pills and coffee in us with a face that said he was so done with everyone and everything. All of us ended up cramped up on the couch and in front of it as we watched morning cartoons. It was pleasant.

Also, Joe and Ray turned up in the middle of the day with bags of groceries and complained about how they were the only responsible ones as they cleaned the apartment. Spencer lamely helped them (being the sweet boy he is) and Frank managed to throw a beer can in the trash can (which gained its fair amount of cheers from us others).

So, any accomplishments this year? Other than me getting to kiss Gabe Saporta. No. I am still a lonely single guy who got majorly dissed by Pete (who will sleep with anyone but me). Apparently I am a nobody, which is pleasant enough, I don’t want to end up like Gabe or Frank. Nothing against the guys though.

Now may also be the perfect time to present Gabe Saporta to you ( ~~Patrick it is literally only you who read this you are not in a TV show~~ ). He’s quite the special guy. Likes to flirt with people and throw parties. When he’s sober, he’s a fairly nice guy. He likes to tease Pete for being short but to tell him that size doesn’t matter and he’s sure that he compensates with it down there. A lot of times I wonder how Pete ended up being friends with him in the first place. The two aren’t too different however. The biggest difference (other than their height) is that one of the dares to show their attraction to Mikey and the other doesn’t (guess who does what ~~(stop Patrick)).~~

  
  


A list of five things Gabe is;

 

• Sexual

• Super tall

• A real hard ass party animal

• Drunk, probably

• Attracted to literally everyone

But no matter how strange I find him to be, he’ll always end up on my friend list (on my friends friend list). Honestly he should start a party planning company, he would earn a lot of cash from that. I should tell him, and then trick him into giving me 20% of the revenue. Good idea, Patrick.

But I guess that second semester of freshman year has been wild. Never thought I would be one to go to these many parties, but with friends who keep on drinking and using drugs it’s kinda hard not to. I knew Pete would go into that sort of crowd, but I guess meeting Frank totally changed my view on things and now I will probably die from alcohol poisoning (even if I drink the least in our group, shocking I know).

Hopefully sophomore year will be less party and more studying (even if I barely think so)

‘til end of next semester

 

Freshman;

CHECK

CHECK

Sophomore;

Junior;

Senior;  
  
Graduation;


	3. Sophomore Year, First Semester

Well holy smokes did the time pass fast. This time we had a long summer break and then a semester which was filled to the brim with celebrations (aka Mikey, Frank and Gabe’s birthdays). But before I tell you about my wonderful first semester of sophomore year I want to recap the summer break... with a list! Wow I am so original that it is almost downright ridiculous. But onto the countdown, number 10-

• Frank accidentally cut a part of his almost shoulder length long hair off, and then proceeded to angrily shave almost everything

• Gerard felt sympathy for him and cut his longer red hair short. It’s almost like a couples costume at halloween parties

• Pete joined in on the hair train wreck thing and dyed his hair a bright shade of pink (it looks hideous)

• Brendon managed to burn his whole back and me and Dallon had to peel the disgusting skin off of his back (because we are nice friends and everyone else were either laughing or filming it. Or both)

• Andy jumped from a cliff into the water and somehow managed to break his arm

• I accidentally inhaled a bee and Pete and Joe almost made me choke as they hit my back too hard (this sounds slightly wrong)

• The Way brothers lost a bet and had to walk around in high heels for a month (now they won’t stop bragging on how they can walk around in heels and even learned Brendon. Contemplating if I should learn as well)

• Ryan was never seen during the whole summer break (but he said he was okay and reported back to us every sunday) and then came back about three days before we were supposed to start our sophomore year

• Gabe was also away during the summer break but in Uruguay and when he came back Mikey blew him (testimony from Brendon and Frank with a big possibility of it not being true)

• Spencer went out hunting with a few friends and came back to our apartment with a dead boar and in turn got a whipping from Frank who acted like an angry mom

It was nice to have some sort of break from the college. I didn’t have to meet any people (because we all just love some sweet social interaction). William and I went out in the city one day however. He later on told me that my friends were following me around and it wasn’t until then I realized all the strange looking people around me were my friends. They scattered and when I confronted them about it they pretended that they were too busy failing to bake a cake. All 13 of them.

Summer break was short however and all of a sudden I was sitting by a table in class listening to one of the professors. But now I’m not going to be miserable and think of that but instead think of how wonderful it is how to have another break even if I have homework to finish (currently a victim to the sleep deprivation/homework procrastination group).

We started off the second year in great ways. Pete got himself a girlfriend the first day but broke up with her the next as he noticed how hot Mikey really was and didn’t want to accidentally cheat on her (even if that most likely wouldn’t happen. Mikey won’t sleep with him and I still believe someone should tell him). Then Joe hooked up with his ex and the two got into an argument where Pete poured a glass of juice over Joe (Pete likes to pour liquid over others I guess. New kink? ~~No kink is new Patrick~~ )

Gerard and Frank broke up the 31st of August, but then got together again after Frank threw his shoe at some professor after he said the color red. Apparently he was triggered and everyone realized that they could never be without each other. They got together two hours after their break up.

Dallon asked Brendon out for a date somewhere in the start of September. Brendon declined and said he liked Ryan (Dallon told me this later when Ray and I comforted him with cookies and ice-cream). Brendon then asked Ryan out on a date. Ryan declined and said he’d rather date Pete. Pete and Ryan dated for three days before they broke it off when Ryan realized that Pete was head over heels for Mikey (yet again).

Ryan also got himself a girlfriend the day before Mikey’s birthday party. She broke up with him after she saw some hot guy at the party and Ryan spent the rest of the party moping around about some girl he barely knew and confessed to only have dated because she was hot.

I would name this semester; The Semester of Heart breaks (there is more to come! (I wouldn’t add this in the name by the way…))

Those simple things happened the days before Mikey’s birthday. The things after his birthday was even worse. To the surprise of most of us, Mikey didn’t want to throw a big ass party. He opted for a gathering with his friends instead. His friends apparently meant about a hundred people (me included).

All in all, that night was long forgotten in the parties I’ve had these past years (I seem like a 40 year old retelling their wild party days during college). By now however college parties have become a daily part of my life. Or weekly. Kinda monthly. I am not a Pete or Gabe spare me. They’ll probably be dead in their thirties ( ~~Patrick that’s an awful thought gosh~~ ).

The party itself wasn’t too exciting for my part. I mostly hung around Dallon and Spencer (who are actually getting along very well nowadays and according to Jon they are plotting against Brendon).

I’m also pretty happy that the party wasn’t set in my shared apartment. It was hosted by Gabe and at his place (he lives in a big apartment, his partners are supporting him okay) so I didn’t have to clean (but I did anyways). For some reason he had a strip pole in the middle of the room and Gerard and Brendon worked it (with heels). I can say they did look great though.

Gabe had a fancy speech for Mikey (who was too drunk to actually take it in and he sat there giggling next to me) and he ended it by proposing to Mikey. It was ironic though (he made it very clear) but Gabe was apparently not that ironic about it as he had an expensive looking ring (I later on got to know it costed him his life savings as it was at the very expensive price at 9 250$). By the end of this year Mikey is still wearing it.

A few days later and Gerard and I had our first audition for some sort of play about two insects trying to fit in with human society. We both got the main roles (as the insects) and we had our few weeks of fame. No one knows who we are now other than two friends of Pete Wentz and Gabe Saporta.

We went to a fancy restaurant to celebrate Andy’s win in the 100th arm wrestling competition. Apparently they didn’t have a table for 12 people and so we had to split up and sit six and six next to each other (I sat with Pete, Joe, Andy, Mikey and Spencer (Ray also said that he thought what we were doing was ridiculous and did not join which was the reasonable option)). It was… an exciting night to say the least.

It started off with the waitress hitting on Pete, who flirted back with her. Then some girl strode by and Joe was gone to the bathroom just a few minutes later and came back with a big smile on his face and a very cocky attitude (ba dun tss). Andy somehow landed in yet another arm wrestling competition (and won that as well) while Spencer, Mikey and I tried to have normal conversation. About turtles.

When we got the food served to us the waitress accidentally spilled food on Mikey who was talking unnaturally excitedly with Pete. Spencer and I are speculating that she didn’t like the fact that they seemed to be so close and had to ruin the night. I think that she was jealous of him and that Mikey was jealous at her as well which is why he spoke with Pete so excitedly. Despite this Mikey is in a non-committed “relationship”. I do not understand romance.

The end of the dinner was quite nice though. Gerard and Frank had shared their food during the whole night. Brendon wanted to ridicule them and asked if Ryan wanted to join in. Ryan said no and threw his water at Brendon. Brendon threw some pasta at Ryan, and the two were kicked out not too long after.

Gerard also refused to give our waitress a tip as she did a shitty job and he angrily stormed out of the restaurant as she insisted she did a good job. Neither of us wanted to pay (we have a running thing going where one of us pays while the rest go free). Jon ended up paying. He was dirt poor for the rest of the semester.

Joe also hired a donkey for a week and kept it in the apartment complex. I think we got to have it there because the landlady likes us. Probably because we’re a pair of young hot guys and there are regularly other young hot guys there so she can ogle and something. I don’t think she gets laid (just like me).

I also managed to break my nose when I played some dance dance revolution. Apparently I was being too good and Gerard thought that he could win if he “”accidentally”” hit me in the face. All he managed to was to break my nose and glasses. Like boyfriend like boyfriend I guess.

Now comes the point we all have been waiting for ( ~~Patrick you are still the only one reading this~~ ). The Halloween birthday party that Frank and Gabe shared. They insisted that we have it in the apartment where I live (because we have some nice access to the roof and our apartment is the go-to place). Our landlady did not agree for once. But with the combined forces of Pete, Mikey and Gabe she changed her mind. You'll have to guess what I mean ( ~~stop it Patrick~~ ).

We had a lot of preparations for the Halloween party which Ray, Spencer and I stood for. We basically did the hard work but then again we are the nicest people around here probably. Spencer somehow managed to pour glitter in Ray’s fro (speculating that it was intentional still not sure). He turned into the human disco ball something that Frank found to be hilarious. So hilarious in fact that Ray poured glitter over him as well.

The party itself however. Despite it being the biggest party of the century (not really) and people talking about it for ages afterwards I did not got laid like everyone else did. Probably because my costume was so amazing that no one wanted to touch it (I was dressed like Mario). Gerard and Frank had a not so surprising couples costume. They went as Chucky and Tiffany (as the dolls of course) from that one Chucky movie. Gerard didn’t wear a dress however but really short shorts. That was apparently pleasing enough for Frank as I didn’t see either for the entire night.

Brendon went as Hello Kitty (well kind of, he walked around in her clothing and had make up to resemble a cat). I think he managed to creep everyone out instead. Ryan put on a pair of glasses without glass in them and a pair of overalls and said he was a minion. It was by far the shittiest costume to ever come out from him. Dallon went as a telephone booth from London, Pete decided to be Napoleon, Joe went as Naruto, Andy as Kyle from South Park, Mikey as Ness from Earthbound, Spencer was a bee (apparently), Jon a pig (he painted his skin pink, really), Ray the floof god of floofness (aka he walked around as if he was in ancient Greece) and Gabe was a prostitute (apparently prostitution is the oldest job in the world). I still think mine was the best.

It wasn’t the costumes that were the most exciting part however (it was the second most exciting part). That was the fact that our landlady joined in on the party. She complimented everyone on their costumes and served us drinks. It was a nice change, but then everyone got really drunk. She did manage to get a dance with Jon however. Hopefully nothing else happened that night.

Frank held a very very drunk speech for all us. I have no idea what the hell it was about. I danced a little, mostly just tried to strike up a conversation with anyone who was willing to talk. The downside of everything was that seriously everyone were drunk. I felt like that one friend in your friend group who has yet to turn 21. I am one of those many friends who isn’t 21 yet. Actually no one of us are allowed to drink. Hopefully the police won’t confiscate this book if anyone of us are caught up in some alcohol related crime. My bet is for Pete.

We did an extreme version of gay chicken. We can’t necessarily play gay chicken because everyone are at least a little gay here, which is why we spiked it up to make it as sexual as we possibly could. So in basic ways the game was to make the others as grossed out as possible as well (even if I’m sure most guys would actually get more or less ‘excited’ so to say) while the two who were doing the whatever couldn’t 1) start laughing 2) moan 3) get hard. Gabe thought the rules were ridiculous but went with it anyways. Probably because he would get to make out with basically everyone.

We spun a bottle, to chose two random people, and it only landed on me once (thankfully). The Lord apparently only heard my prayers once as I got to do it with Mikey, who was drunk, very drunk (like always on parties). I ended up moaning after about five seconds of Mikey sucking on my neck and everyone laughed at me. The most action I’ve gotten yet.

Frank ended up throwing a can of beer in Jon’s head as he and Gerard were starting to get too close. Frank then proceeded to ‘murder’ Jon as he was indeed Chucky. Jon then said that he’d just killed an animal and Frank started to cry. Being an emotionally drunk vegetarian who just murdered your friend who is dressed as a pig must be hard.

I actually left the party after not too long with Ryan and went to his dorm room. He said too many people had bullied his awful costume (which they low-key had the right to). We ended up watching Titanic and cried in each other’s arms. Spencer came back (we managed to scare the living shit out of him by existing) and then the three of us watched Forrest Gump (and cried).

In the early morning we went back to my apartment (to find the damn door unlocked). Ray was already on his way cleaning the mess up, and so the three musketeers decided to help him. We gave up after five minutes though and waited for everyone to come back. Gerard and Frank were the first ones to return (from upstairs) but Gerard was now dressed in a tutu and Frank in a sombrero hat with a fake mustache.

Brendon came rolling in on a skateboard as Dallon was tiredly clapping his hands in a fake amused way. Brendon said he got laid with Ryan. Ryan said that we’d sat up watching movies all night. Brendon has yet to this day to know who that person he slept with was (my speculation is that it was that one creepy girl who also dressed up as a minion only slightly better than Ryan. I think she likes Brendon. Or well Spencer thinks)

Soon enough did the friends drop in. Joe smelled like pumpkins, Andy’s hair was now a bright shade of yellow (he said he’d gotten it dyed by some other guy with yellow hair who I will mention later) and Jon said to never speak to him again. Pete brought a guitar with him to our apartment. He stated that a hobo got it for him. I still think he stole it from the hobo.

Mikey came back in the middle of the night and during that time Gerard had our apartment window open and a sang a song about him. He stood there for five hours and sang. When Mikey did arrive he threw a vase at him which essentially did hit Mikey. In the face. Now Mikey probably has a permanent scar over his right eyebrow and Gerard is probably permanently scarred for the rest of his life.

To celebrate nothing in particular we went to an amusement park. The only thing I did was hold everyone else’s things. Thankfully I was accompanied by Spencer (my sweet little dude) and maybe we ate too many candy bars because we were soon running around with everyone’s stuff. It was fun however, even if I did manage to drop my phone and ruin the whole screen.

Brendon, Ryan and Dallon also went on multiple rides together. It always ended with Dallon trying to talk to Brendon who was trying to talk to Ryan who in turn was ignoring everyone around himself. That is until he and Gerard took off to go look at some ducks and we all forgot them until we were supposed to leave. Jon also threw up on Ray’s shoes. Mama Ray was not happy and forced Jon to switch shoes with him. Still not entirely sure how that ordeal ended as I got pulled away by Pete and Mikey to do some “fun ~~shit~~ ”.

Pete ended up winning four small penguins, one big unicorn and a super big (really big it’s almost about half my height) teddy bear. He gave them all to Mikey who actually cried of joy. If I am correct he now sleeps with all of those in his room. Frank also ended up winning not a single thing. Pete ended up winning a medium sized elephant and gave it to Frank who gave it to Gerard. I still think that Frank holds a small grudge against Pete.

Then when thanksgiving rolled around we all went home. Or well not all of us as Joe apparently lived in our apartment during the time we were gone. Jon had apparently resigned there as well and the two had their own celebration consisting of gummy bears and chewing gum. The two are now arguably closer.

I didn’t go to the annual Christmas party thing (because you know there’s this thing called homework), but here’s a list of things that allegedly happened.

• Frank lost his shoes (and had to share with us others for the rest of the short semester)

• Spencer somehow made a whole fridge fall and no one is sure as to how (not even him)

• Gabe was the sex guru and you could go to him to ask for sex tips

• Dallon tried to flirt with Brendon

• Brendon tried to flirt with Ryan

• Ryan actually slapped Brendon

• Gerard thought he was Batman and jumped off a bed only to break his wrist

• Mikey blew Pete (in front of everyone)

• Joe blew up a glass after he tried to mixture some stuff together and it was allegedly awesome

• Ray was acting like a security guard and even threw some annoying guy out of the apartment

• I missed everything

I soon got bored of homework and went for a walk instead and met two boys who were trying to help a cat down from a tree. Those two are now two of my friends. They presented themselves as Tyler and Josh, two best buds who are totally not at all together why would you even think that they are boyfriends. Josh then later on appeared to be the one who dyed Andy’s hair.

The two of them are really close friends however. Like. Really. They are dating, or they are boyfriends, but they keep denying it. I do not get why they keep saying no when we seriously have video proof of them kissing. They still tell us it is all staged and that we are conspiring against them.

Tyler is rather shy, but once you get close to him he’ll be very excited over really anything. He says he’s religious and the other second says he sacrifices puppies to satan (which always made Frank angry and so he changed it to monkeys which got Pete angry and it is now cockroaches (no one likes cockroaches)). He can also play the ukulele pretty damn well.

So, a list of five things Tyler is;

• Very sweet

• Religious (for Satanism of course)

• A pea

• Really an angry metal head with an ukulele

• Utterly and hopelessly in love with Josh

Josh however is more social than Tyler but still states that they are not in any sort of way together. He’s generally easier to get along with and he and Gerard have bonded over the whole hair dye thing. They have come to a mutual agreement that Pete should dye his hair back to black again. They even once played ac/dc’s ‘back in black’ and followed him around a whole day.

A list of five things Josh is;

• Probably shirtless right now

• An angry puppy

• Maybe a murderer (Spencer and Jon are onto it)

• A fan of weddings, likes to attend random ones

• Totally and grotesquely in love with Tyler

I helped the cat down however and we started to talk with each other and they have now been taken into my group of friends (I actually became friends with them first shocking). If you want a friend save a cat for them even if it’s not their cat.

Now as I’m writing this it’s in the middle of the night and I’m lying under the stars with the Way brothers on either side of me. My hands are freezing despite the fact that I have gloves on. I do not understand how these two hoes next to me aren’t freezing. Or maybe they are. They may be asleep which is even less believable because it’s very cold outside. But there is no snow so we can at least lie on the cold grass and possibly get sick.

This year wasn’t the most exciting however. Or maybe it’s because I’m getting used to the college life (I’m one of the rad kidzz). We’ll open some shitty Christmas presents tomorrow. I’ll probably give Frank back the guitar he bought for me. He tried to steal it once but I caught him and “the battle of the minions” started, as Joe named it. Hopefully he’ll be happy.

‘til end of next semester

Freshman;

CHECK

CHECK

Sophomore;

CHECK

Junior;

Senior;

Graduation;

(PS. They were sleeping)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'M RUNNING OUT OF IDEAS HALP

**Author's Note:**

> this is a mess
> 
> I'm a mess
> 
> haha I'm funny
> 
> Not really


End file.
